Thursday, February 24, 2011

Moments Make the Day

     “Life moves on, whether we act as cowards or heroes. Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such.”
Henry Miller

     The WOD is a formidable opponent.  When you get to the end of it, collapse, and think about what you just overcame the world makes a little more sense.  I was driving home with my window down thinking about this past month.  It has been an amazing journey for me with the help of everyone at World Camp Crossfit.  The coaches are amazing, and I am going to miss Evan when he leaves to follow his dream in Florida.  It's not about the coaches even though they are intimidating (especially during wall sits when you want to put your hands against the wall but Evan is toting a 20lb med ball to throw at you).  I've found so many encouraging women and men.  Some of them, I don't even know their names but they smile and tell me that I can do it.  It's that split second when you overcome your worst fear when you realize it's easier to give up physically; however, you know that giving up is not an option mentally.  
     I believe in my body more than I ever have in the past.  Today, I thought I was not going to be able to finish my last round of the workout.  With two minutes remaining, I dropped my kettle bell and began my 10 walking lunges.  I returned to the kettle bell.  I picked up the 35lbs and kept saying "this is it" over and over in my head.  This is what I've been training for, the ability to overcome my weaknesses.  I also surprised myself in the burpee department.  I despise burpees... so when we found out their role in the WOD today, I felt myself heave a sigh.   I was about to set myself up for failure.  Then I realized I have nothing to lose by pushing myself through them.  I believe it made a big difference in how the rest of the workout went.  
     I miss my husband terribly right now.  He knows that I am working out, but has no idea I'm crossfitting.  I'm hoping to see him in about a month.  The Coast Guard's schedule changes so much especially when they are on patrol.  I'm proud he is out there doing his part to stop illegal immigration, drug smugglers, and terrorists.  I want him to come home so I can talk on the phone with him.  This emailing is tiring and when he does get to call the phones are terrible.    I hope he appreciates the work I've put into myself.  If I can find that dang tape measure, I'll put up my measurements... for now back to taking care of my grandmother.

"I must be a mermaid, Rango. I have no fear of depths and a great fear of shallow living."
— Anaïs Nin

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